Once upon a time, anxiety did what anxiety is supposed to do. You counted on it to rush in when things got tense. It tapped you on the shoulder and whispered “time to go.” It firmly advised you to plant your feet and fight.
But now?
Now, you can’t count on anxiety to simply provide fight or flight support, because anxiety keeps overstepping its role. It is there when you wake up, whispering an earful of worries and concerns. It is there when you lie down, keeping you awake at night.
Here are some ideas on how to put an end to the on-going crisis in your mind.
1. Breathe.
Your body reacts quickly to the rush of anxious energy invading your body. You tense up, your heart rate quickens: you’re on high alert.
It’s easy to forget to take in long, stabilizing oxygen–rich breaths, but you need them. Fast, shallow bits of air only make things worse.
2. Practice Paying Attention
What’s really going on when anxious thoughts overrule your more rational thoughts?
Try to slow your racing thoughts and roiling emotions. Take a look around. Where’s the danger? Are you afraid of something happening now or something that might happen? What is truly threatening you?
Name your concerns. Write them down. Clarify and identify the truth of the situation.
3. Decide to Take Control.
Plan ahead. If you are able to identify some key areas of worry, make it a goal to answer those worries as they arise.
Do you often get sidetracked with financial fears? Take action by meeting with a financial advisor, get clear information, and put a savings plan in place.
Is your fear of abandonment straining your relationship? Don’t allow anxiety to drive a wedge between you. Talk about it, plan to spend more time together, or visit a couples counselor.
4. Face Facts.
Life does come with some uncertainties. You can’t avoid every unsafe situation, uncomfortable conversation, or unwelcome turn of events. However, by practicing acceptance and learning to tolerate negativity and unpredictability, you can live life without feeling victimized by it.
5. Do a Perception Inspection.
Anxiety says life is out to get you. At the height of your worry, it seems true. Try to think through those moments of black and white thinking. Is the situation really so extreme? Consider the idea that you may be seeing just one part of a troubling situation. Might there be a positive side?
Challenge your negative, distorted thinking. Push against thought patterns that take you to a place in your head where worst-case scenarios, overgeneralization, and unproven conclusions reside.
6. Be Where You Are.
If you think about it, a lot of anxiety comes from worrying about the future. Scary, future disasters. Worrisome, future circumstances. Upsetting, future mistakes.
What if you tried to be in the present, in this moment, at this time? Living in the moment is a lot less daunting than attempts to protect yourself from every approaching problem.
To keep you firmly focused on the here and now, try mindfulness meditation or visualization techniques.
7. Keep Calm Company.
Moods are communicable, contagious, and infectious. Seek out positive, healthy companionship. Embrace relationships that facilitate respectful, supportive communication and connection.
Keep anxiety in its place by knowing your triggers. Avoid people or situations that feed your fears and negativity.
If your primary relationships are currently a source of anxiety, consider scheduling time with an experienced therapist. He or she may be the calming presence you need to help overcome anxiety for good.
Denise Kautzer is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor and a Certified Public Accountant whose practice is located in St. Paul, MN. You can view her website at www.denisekautzer.com or contact her at denise@denisekautzer.com.